A Dead End Situation in Marriage

Hello God’s people, how are you doing and how are you enjoying the weekend? Because it’s a Saturday, I think we can make do with a marriage story. So today I will be sharing a marriage story that ended on a not-so-good note, but we can at least learn from the mistakes of others. I believe that’s what wisdom is all about.

There is this young loving and hardworking lady who got married to a young man she obviously was in love with. I am convinced she didn’t pray before making that decision and going by the history of the man she married he is not one to stay committed to a relationship for too long. For whatever reason he gets bored with women all too soon and without any reasonable reason he walks out of his relationships after about two years.

This lady had dated the guy for over a year when they eventually got married to the surprise and joy of the guy’s family as they were already worried and wearied by his continuous change of women in his life. But just two years into their marriage, this husband got tired of his wife and became adulterous again. Not too long after his initial flings, the husband moved out of the house he shared with his wife with the intention of getting married to another lady and left the wife all by herself . As a matter of fact he had promised marriage to the new lady in his life. His excuse and allegation was that his wife was cheating on him. 

This excuse angered his mother and with it he secured her sympathy and support to walk of his marriage, but not her approval to marry another woman. But after proper investigation a few months later, it was discovered that his allegation of his wife cheating on him was a lie and that the wife had been faithful to their marriage vows all along. Every effort to prevail on him to take his wife back fell on deaf hears; just like all other women in his life, he was bored with her.

This story happened about 8years ago and the husband had had similar encounter with about 3-4 other women after he left his wife; only that he never got to marry them. He is currently living with the 5^th woman after his marriage to the beautiful young lady. The wife on the other hand remains unmarried till date. You will agree with me that this is a very sad marriage story.

One important thing to always understand is that there is no perfect marriage and there will always be different challenges in life that when you hear of it, it appears as though it’s unheard of. But there is nothing new under the sun and there is nothing that life throws at you that God cannot handle.

Maybe or maybe not, the story would have been different if this lady had prayed before getting married to this guy, but even as at today I will say this is a sad marriage story that the Lord can turn around for good if you as the wife let Him.

My counsel to this wife is this: As long as you still have the breath of God in you, you still remain a wife to this man before God. I understand that you didn’t seek the face of God before getting married but the fact that God permitted the marriage and nothing happened to prevent the marriage from taking place tells me that your mistake is still within the ability of God to turn around for good. Your dead marriage is still a marriage that the Lord can and will breathe life into and it will come alive if only you let Him. God will only do this with your cooperation and so it requires you willingly inviting Him into the situation.

We learned in Matthew 19:8-9 that divorce is as a result of the hardness of man’s heart, but at the beginning, it was not so. As a child of God your marriage will only be dead because your heart is hard, divorce is not the will of God for you or your marriage and if there is still room for making amends I will encourage you to explore the option of reconciliation. Don't just give up on this man; if his soul is all that you can work with God to safe from hell I can assure you that the host of heaven will be proud of you. 

You will wonder how to reconcile with a man who is already living with another woman as wife. Well the hedge you have in this situation is that you are the wife of his youth; you are the legal wife that the Lord recognizes. Jacob was married to Leah and Rachael, yet it was Leah that got the support and favor of God. Abraham was married to Sarah and then took Haggai as maid/wife, yet it was on Sarah that the love and favor of God rested in that marriage. So your case is not different, no matter how many women claim to be your husband’s wife, you still remain the one who carries the favor of God in that marriage. You are the wife God recognizes.

You will have to fight for what is yours in prayers. From what I can deduce from this situation, this husband is a man who desperately needs help. If a man cannot settle down with a single woman and he gets bored with women so very easily that is a man who needs urgent help. Just like a violent husband is a man who needs help, and a financially broke husband is a man who needs help, so also is an adulterous husband a man who needs urgent help. And even though you are the one at the receiving end of his numerous problems, you are still the God appointed helper for his life. So you will begin to pray for him; you will wage war against any and every power that has infiltrated your husband’s life and has caused him to continually change women as though he were changing his clothing. You will pray your dead marriage back to life and prophesy to the deadness of your marriage to come alive. Then you will pay attention to the voice of God and anything the Lord tells you to do, do it. By the special grace of the living God, I await your testimony in Jesus name.