Thursday 14 April 2016

Getting Practical With Marriage Issues

Good day beautiful people of God, its always a wonderful and fulfilling opportunity to share the truth of God’s word again in this blog. And I pray his word will bring light to every day area of our marriage and home in Jesus name.
Today I want to share a story that happened to someone I know well. This story is not peculiar to my friend, but it’s a story I have heard happen to a lot of women and I trust the Lord to help women having such issue to heal and find fulfillment in life again.

Issue
I have never felt so used and dejected by someone I loved and trusted so much; my husband of 28years. When I was still active in work, based on the position I held and the opportunities that came with my job I had the opportunity to make good extra wealth outside of my salary. I met my husband as a struggling man while I had very wealthy parents and because of the love I had for him I didn’t consider him low in status than I was, despite some objections I married him anyway. I helped my husband climbed the ladder of wealth and affluence in life. As a result of the opportunities afforded me on my job, I invested all my extra wealth on my husband. We had a lot of joint businesses that I ran and grew while all he did was just to sign the cheques. The inflows in the business accounts were all my efforts but the outflows where all his efforts. I didn’t foresee any problem coming up in future between us with regards to money, the love I had for him superseded any suspicion in my marriage. I wanted to make my marriage work by all means possible and so getting suspicious was not what a allowed to play host in my mind. Even when I heard stories of my husband’s escapades with other women I still didn’t see it affecting our business life. I managed both the business and the home front to the best of my ability with the business and career taking the forefront of my focus. Raising my children suffered though, but I managed to give them the best that money can buy. They all schooled abroad and enjoyed the luxuries of life. Now I am out of paid employment, and just when I thought I could cash-in on all my investment in my joint business with my husband and start another business that I can run on my own, my husband did a U-turn on me. He had removed my name and signature from all that we owned together, he removed my name as his next-of-kin and now all I do is just sit at home and wait on him while he goes about in the luxury of the wealth I worked for and he just gives me stipends when he deems it necessary. Another issue that I also have to battle with is my health. I have a very big battle with my health that keeps me in the hospital for months at the stretch. I am coming to terms with my fate and trust God to accept my soul if I die in this struggle. I am still married to my husband and I am sure everyone will reap just what they have sown. I pray and hope my children will learn from my mistakes. My only regret in life is that I should have taken time to be a better mother to my children and bring them up properly rather chase wealth that a man who is not worth it will eventually take over. The little strength I have left now is to give my children the mothering I didn't give them when they were young. Now they are in their twenties with lack of properly discipline evident in their character which is what I am now struggling to correct as the Lord still spares my life.

Response
This narration is very touching I must say and when things like this happen it is very easy to blame God and ask where was God when all these was happening. I feel so touched that I am tempted to be a bit biased in what I have to share in response to this, but at this time I will trust God to speak to you through me and not just to you, but to as many as have found themselves in a situation such as this. First I need to ask if you prayed and sought the face of God before getting married to your husband? I understand and know that God’s instruction to the wife in marriage is to submit to her husband in everything as to the Lord, but I would want to ask if you prayed to God before investing your wealth in the life of your husband? You are his suitable helper that God has placed in his life to help him fulfill his destiny, but not assigned to work and put all your life’s saving in your husband’s bank account to spend or a joint account which you don't have control over. I am most certain that if you did pray before getting married, you will still have very little hitches in the marriage, but not as grievous as this. And if you had consulted with God before putting all your wealth in your husband’s account the story would have been a little different. If your husband needed financial support you are required by God’s instruction to give him that support, but God did not ask us as wives to make our husbands our retirement plan. But nonetheless, you are still the suitable helper the Lord has provided for your husband to help him be a better person. Do not let material wealth prevent you from the assignment God has assigned you to do in his life. This is a typical example of what God says that “Cursed is the man who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for strength,” (Jeremiah 17:5-9) your husband is just being a typical man. You will surely find it hard to trust him again, but that’s okay. Just trust God alone and put all your strength in focusing on God. When you do, the following things will happen: 1) He will right all the wrongs in your life, 2) He will bring you out of the sick bed, 3) He will teach your hands to make wealth again such that all that has been lost shall be recovered in an increased measure, 4) He will turn the lives of your children around for good, 5) He will heal your marriage and make your husband a better Christian. He will breathe life again into your marriage and as you are following in His instructions for your life and home, you will be able to be the suitable helper for your husband again and fulfill your mandate in his life once again. In doing all this, the glory of the latter you will surely surpass that of the former. In fact you will totally forget this period of your life as God will make you forget all that you have gone through if only you can carelessly unburden yourself at the feet of Jesus and raise your head in focus on Him alone. There is nothing you do or nothing anybody can do that can give you a refreshing and positive exit from all these troubles outside of what God can do. Don’t resign yourself to the fate of what you are going through as the will of God because it is not. God didn’t create us to suffer and die in our sufferings. The challenges of life are there to train us to be better people and not to break us. His will for is perfectly good to give us hope and bring us to an expected end. You have made your mistakes and though you have suffered for it, now is the time to walk out of those mistakes and their consequences and let God replace the bad with good. You will have a refreshing start again in Jesus name.

1 comment:

  1. A very touching story indeed. I say AMEN to all the prayers above. The only mistake I think you made here was not paying attention to your children and not 'investing' in their lives(attitude, morals and the motherly care and attention). The children in any marriage I believe should be the future of the couple. Your husband can replace you and have another wife but no matter how bad a woman is, she can never be replaced. No child can choose to die and be born of another mother simply because a mother is bad. Mothers should learn to invest quality time in their children. God will not ask you how your husband turned out, but will ask you how the kids He put in your care turned out! As you take care of your husband and spend time with him, remember, he is a product of your mother-in-law, (if she didn't take good care of him you probably wouldn't have found him appealing). Your kids will be your own products too. AS regards your financial investments with your husband, you simply loved and loved genuinely, it isn't peculiar to you but its unfortunate you invested in the wrong man. Some women did what you did, some did less and some more and are in abundance of all. The Lord will correct all the wrongs and give you a brand new song. With God nothing is impossible. You are on the right path, invest both spiritually (prayers) and morally in your children and leave the rest to God. He will turn their hearts towards you and you will have joy everlasting IJMN. You need to pray more now than ever!

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