Getting Practical With Marriage Issues (2)

Hello beautiful people of God, I bless God for another wonderful opportunity to share the truth of God’s word with you. I thank God that the seed of His word in our lives and homes is germinating and producing fruits of a beautiful marriage to the glory of His holy name.

In today’s post I am trusting God to teach us to be able to handle right some practical issues in marriage. The first of such practical issues is handling a cheating husband. The issue a husband cheating on his wife is one that so many wives have found quite unbearable and has led to a lot of marriage break-ups more so that Jesus has given infidelity as an excuse for a marriage to break-up. I once spoke to a lady who at that time just got married and we were talking on marriage matters and she told me that she can never give her body to her husband any longer once she finds out he has cheated on her. In as much as I won’t blame this lady for making such a conclusion, I will say that the reality can be a little different.

In the part of the world where I come from, it is assumed that it’s a man’s world and it’s okay if a man cheats on his wife or at least it more understandable when it's the husband doing the cheating than when it's the wife who is unfaithful to her husband. So it is totally unacceptable for a wife to cheat on her husband. While I am also totally against a woman cheating on her husband for any reason at all, I am wondering if a woman has blue blood rather than red for her not to get furious with anger if ever she discovers her husband is cheating on her. So just as a man would flip out if he discovers his wife is cheating on him, so should a wife also be expected to flip out if and when she discovers her husband is cheating on her.

But what happens after you discovered your spouse cheated on you or is cheating on you and you have gotten furious and angry. Is it possible to forgive him and move on and act as if nothing happened or you allow the anger to remain and possibly lead to the break-up of the union? This question has come up in my head so many times, and it has been a topic of debate on a private chat group that I belong to. Some women like the one I mentioned earlier will find it hard to live beyond the hurt that arouse from the betrayal, but in truth it’s a choice that we have to make.

If ever I find myself in that situation I have resolved to only one choice and that is to look the other way, forgive and move on with my marriage. Yes, it’s easier said than done, but I know someone whose been there before and that was her choice and till date she doesn't regret it. Because she still has her marriage intact, she has a repentant spouse and her home is at peace. Rather than remain angry and habour resentment for her spouse, she was awakened to the need to pray for him. She came to the realization that there must be a problem for that to happen and since she was his suitable helper assigned to him by God, she knew that rather than prolong the anger, she needed to help him overcome the problem.

So she began to pray. she prayed for him that God would deliver him from the sin of adultery. With the help of the Holy-Spirit she also made some improvement on herself to appear more attractive to him as his wife, she tried to put better efforts to her activities in the home, beginning with the food, his personal care and that of the children and with the help of God her home is a lot better now.

But what if she had walked out of the marriage in anger, although she will not be committing any sin by getting a divorce on the grounds of infidelity, but that leaves her with only one action next and that is to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband (1 Corinthians 7). So it all falls back to the same thing she is trying to run away from. If then she can’t take another husband, she had better help her husband become a better husband that she can be proud of since that is what God has called me to be in his life (a helper).

So I will say these to all ladies struggling with infidelity in their marriage, its okay to express you’re hurt. It’s okay to cry and feel betrayed, but after all said and done, its important to let go off the hurt and look to heaven to help you help your husband become a better husband. That is the role you are in his life to play and with God on your side he will surely become a better person to the glory of God alone.